Adopting your stepchild not only bridges the legal gap between stepparents and children, it can make your family feel connected!
While some children may wish to be adopted, others may not have an interest in the idea at all. Many factors can play a role in why a child may or may not have an interest in being adopted by a stepparent.
Some factors to consider…
1st -Consider the parent you would replace. Does he or she still have contact with the child, or has the parent abandoned the child? Would this parent be willing to consent to adoption?
2nd -Understand that, to be able to adopt, the biological parent must formally and legally consent, be deceased or the court must find that the parent has abandoned the child.
3rd - Realize that the definition of abandonment is one that varies from state to state but generally means that the parent no longer is a part of the child's life. (In Pennsylvania, 6mo is considered abandonment)
4th - Contact a lawyer in your area who handles adoptions, or obtain books about how to file the adoption on your own in your state. (If you have multiple children, find out if a group petition can be filed. If not, you may be responsible for paying a retainer fee per child/case)
5th - Request the necessary forms from court personnel if you are handling the adoption on your own.
6th - Decide what the child's name will be after the adoption. Will you be changing the child's last name to match yours? Discuss this with the child and your spouse.
7th- Think about the need for counseling. IF YOU ARE ADOPTING AN OLDER CHILD who has a memory of the other parent, counseling may help the child deal with his or her feelings about the adoption.
8th- Make certain that you understand the legal implications of adoption. You will become the child's legal parent, no different than if you were the biological parent. You have the right to obtain custody should you ever divorce. You are responsible for supporting the child. THE CHILD WILL HAVE THE RIGHT TO INHERIT FROM YOU WHEN YOU DIE.
Although it can take a lot of effort, time, and money, if it is something that means a lot to you and the stepchild then keep working at it. If the child doesn't consent to the idea, it is important that as the stepparent you not take it personal. For some children, this process can be very confusing and uncomfortable.
If your stepchild refuses the idea of being adopted, know that his/her decision may not be any reflection of the love and/or care they have for you.
Remember always to reinforce your love, care, and/or concern for your stepchild despite the outcome of any family situation.
To learn more about stepchild adoption, and think your family may be ready for this step, visit www.rapidadoption.com, www.legalmatch.com, or www.adoptionservices.org.
or Contact the Attorney who helped our family @:
Cantor & Meyer, P.C.
2 S. Orange Street, Suite 201
Media, PA 19063
Phone: 610-566-6164
Fax: 610-566-6168
A well informed family makes a HAPPIER and STRONGER family!
~The Stepfamily GURU~
